Chapter 3 Nothing is Displaced When Nothing is Replaced





It was all okay.

It was all very fine.

Until our 7th monthsary...

"Happy monthsary my Kenjie."
This time, I am totally and madly in love with Ken.
7 months. And natatapos na ang first sem.
Nasasanay na ako sa lahat, sa pag sasabay namin sa lunch time, sa panonood ng sine almost every saturday, sa pag dalaw sa kanil paminsan minsan, sa pag dalaw nya samin pa minsan minsan, sa pag pupunta nya sa room ko everytime he is free, sa pakikisit-in ko sa room nya everytime may gagawin syang presentation, sa pagpapaturo sa kanya sa english, kahit na yung mga blockmates nya kilala ko na.

Nasanay na ako sa lahat.

Kuya Jojo called me. Sya, kanyang pamilya, at si Kuya Toto will be coming back. Kaya lang, they will stay in Manila lang. Magbabakasyon daw. Kaya, pagka sembreak, pupunta kami ni Tiya Isabel sa Manila. Excited na ako! Sasabihin ko na rin sana na meron na akong boyfriend.

PERO...

"Uhmm... I'm busy. I'll call you if I have time na lang!"
Tapos, he kissed me on my cheek.

Okay. Busy daw. Ayan ha. Hmmm. Baka may surpresa sakin! HAHA. Alam ko na ang diskarte nya. Hmmm. Sige, kunwari, hindi ko alam!


Then, I waited for his call.

Hanggang sa papalubog na ang araw.

Hanggang sa...

Gumabi na.


He called me! YES!

"Jini, can we talk?"
"YES. Sure ken! Where?"


Pumunta ako agad.
He was there. Standing, a plain white shirt.
Then he hugged me!
Habang ako, hindi mapigilang ngumiti!

"Akala ko hindi ka tatawag!"
"Jini, look, busy kasi ako masyado ngayon."
"Alam ko! Okay lang, naiintindihan kita, syempre dami mong orgs, SHOWBIZ ka eh!"
"I mean. Hindi ko na kaya ang responsibility as your boyfriend!"
What does he mean?
"Ha? Anong ibig mong sabihin!?"
Hindi sya nagsalita!
"Ken? Ano?"
Tapos, I'm almost crying!
"tell me! You don't mean that right?"
Hindi pa rin sya nagsalita!
"Do you love me or not?"
Hindi pa rin talaga!
"Kenjie! Tell me!"
"Jini. Nitong mga nakaraang araw, hindi ko na kasi masyadong na fifeel."
Ano?
"I'm so sorry!"
Tapos, yumuko ako, I cried. Yes! I cried!
He didn't even bother to hug me or wipe my tears!
"So? Sino?! Tell me? Sino ang pinalit mo sakin?"
"No! No! I'm not in love with somebody else right now!"
Heck! He IS NOT INLOVE with ANYONE! NOT ME!

But. You see, nobody is displaced when nothing is replaced.


---


And yes we broke up!

I am looking at our old pictures. Pictures when we were still together.

Pero, barkada pa rin kami hanggang ngayon!
In fact, may plano kaming mag outing this sembreak.

And today, we are going to meet each other.
Its been 1 month since we broke up. And, this is the first time na magkikita kami ulit.

And me? I have recovered.

Recovered.

Hindi tulad last month na halos araw2x akong umiiyak, ngayon every other day na lang.
Last month, halos hindi ako makakain, ngayon, kumakain na.
Last month, hindi ko kayang mag isa kasi baka may maalala, ngayon, ang galing ko ng mag DOTA pampalipas oras.
Last month, babaeng babae pa ako, ngayon??

Back to zero!


HAHAHA.. wala na akong pinapangalagaang image ngayon!

NYAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

KAHIT ANO NAHHHH..

FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOMM..

I'M FREEE...

Labels: Loving Darkness